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| Pink Boots ’n All -- The Beer-Laden Life of a Brewery Rep |
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| Written by Suzanne Woods | ||||||||
| November 30, 2008 | ||||||||
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We’ve decided to fill the void created by the departure of Ms Mug author Lauren Clarke with a series of guest columns giving the female perspective in the beer world. First to fill this spot, called Pink Boots ’n All, is our Philadephia reporter Suzanne Woods. Ms. Woods works as a sales rep for Sly Fox Brewing Co., and runs a women’s tasting club in Philadelphia, In Pursuit of Ale (IPA). At least once a day I have someone tell me how lucky I am to be in brewery sales. And I am. But there’s so much that goes into this job. The work is truly never ever done. There’s beer to be drank. Beer to be sold. Beer to be donated. Tap handles to sell in. Tap handles to drop off. Tap handles to be fixed. Hand-sells to pour, displays to arrange, events to be planned. Events to be executed. The more beer brewed, the more there is to be sold. Here are four stand outs of selling the suds. 1. “What have you done for me lately?” I get constant requests for coasters, neons, glassware, promotions, “one on four” (my favorite), football tickets, etc… Having great beer at affordable pricing doesn’t really sell beer anymore. Enticement is illegal, yet everywhere, not all, but many bar owners and managers constantly have their hands out. “Install a new draft system for me, and the two end handles are all yours.” Once I heard, “Suzanne, I really love your beer and we would love to carry it. We see this as an investment in a long term relationship, so we ask that you throw the first keg our way.” I’m thinking, “You love our beer? Well I love when people buy our beer because they simply like good beer.” This crooked conduct is going on whilst other organizations are endlessly asking for donations. I don’t think they realize that many small craft breweries are borderline charities. 2. A Duchess of Hazard Booze Face, obesity and parking tickets are just three hazards of the job. The life of a beer rep is a lush life. And by lush I mean one of liquid, not of loot. Of obesity. It’s important to balance the beer with a constant stream of water and exercise. A moment on the lips truly is a lifetime on the hips. I try to get on my bike every weekend, but I find myself at the bar stool a bit more than the bike trail. Although there are many health benefits of beer, one debit is Vitamin B. Vitamin B helps replace the nutrients lost while drinking, so I take that every day. Also brewer’s yeast is a good source of Vitamin B, prompting me to search out cask-conditioned beer often. This is a job that requires a frequent amount of face time. And face time leads to booze face. Of booze face. You may be curious, “What is booze face?” Booze face happens when women, after years of “just one more” earn a permanent reddish tint, broken capillaries, and a general pickling. Think Tara Reid in 10 years. Think Lynda Carter 10 years ago. Kinda hot, but in a booze face way. Of parking tickets. To know me is to know that I single handedly funded the renovation of the Philadelphia Parking Authority’s west wing. I even made a significant contribution towards their Christmas bonus. Why all the parking tickets? Here’s a typical ticket: I’ll park in a loading zone to run in and drop off a sign for the owner, when what to my wondering eyes should appear, but a local competitor’s tap handle instead of my beer. Let the trouble shooting begin. After all is settled and I’ve learned it was either a “favor” for another brewery rep, or there’s a new bar manager, etc. I head back to my car 32 minutes later. And two minutes too late. My windshield has been littered with a $41 ticket. 3. Turnaway: The other walk of shame. About a year ago I walked into a bar around lunch time. It was a cold call, as in no appointment was arranged. I ordered a Flying Dog Gonzo and bacon-wrapped scallops. The owner came out and the first thing he said to me was, “I am never going to carry your beer.” Ouch! I got to listen to the 13 reasons why while I waited for my lunch. I thought I could potentially win him over. He seemed like an alright guy…he just didn’t want to support any local breweries. My nerves were shot. But when given the opportunity to leave gracefully, I did the opposite by accidentally dropping a bomber of IPA. Twenty-two ounces in the bottle suddenly looked like 66 on his barroom floor. I was mortified. And no closer to ever needing to drop off stickers for a rotating handle. There are plenty of bars that told me they would “Think about it.” That means no. But, I don’t try to sell our beer to any bars that I don’t feel are a good fit. So I’ll go back a few times until I realize they aren’t remotely hands on, they never rotate their beers, and their beers actually taste like butter. Then I realize it really isn’t a good fit for us. 4. Standing out in a crowd of fellow beer reps. As with any sales job, there’s a need to stand out. These bar/distributor owners see 12-15 reps a day. I find ways to leave an imprint that matches the beer I sell. If the owner is not there and I want to drop a sample off, I leave it in a little brown handled bag with a ribbon and a love letter with my contact information. Secondly, it’s a total disservice to only drink your beer. Sure, you love your beer, heck — you’re an ambassador! But you have to see what other breweries are up to. I have to taste what Troegs is brewing. How things are coming along at the new Yards brewery? If a bar is already carrying one or two of my beers and they need suggestions on what to carry next I can act more like a consultant than an aggressive sales person. I like that. Most sales reps have a black bag, wear khakis, a collared golf shirt and sunglasses on their forehead. You can spot them as soon as they enter the bar…and you’re probably going to hide. I dress according to the bars I plan on visiting that day. Sometimes jeans are a bit more appropriate. I also sport a bright taxi yellow sales bag. I don’t have a beer at every bar throughout the day, but I will have one or two. A pint goes a long way with buyers. There are many reps out there that want to make it to their mandated 12 accounts by 5 p.m., but never ring the register once. I might not be able to offer them box seats at the Eagles game, but I will certainly patronize their pub. I couldn’t sell just anything. I love beer. And when you represent great beer, know about the beer, and have a pinch of persistence, you’ll make the sale. And on an ideal day, you’ll have an extra $41 in your pocket.
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